Pamela Findling is now a working mom. She's a network analyst at UBC and returning to her job after a year of maternity leave was a huge adjustment.

"The first couple of months were just exhausting, but I loved being back at work."

Mom Pamela misses 18-month old Jaxon. But it's a delicate balance - how to be the best mom she can be -- while meeting the demands of her job.

Pamela says, "Before, I would have no problem staying later. If something came up at work, I could stay 'til five, five thirty. I could come in earlier or work weekends quite easily if I wanted too. Now, it's a lot harder for me to do that."

Lisa Martin is the Founder and President of "Briefcase Moms." She says it's natural to feel your children tugging at you -- but also feeling tremendous responsibility to your employer.

"There is no silver bullet, that's the first answer. How do you strike a balance? I think the first thing is to first and foremost figure out what that means to you because it's a very individual definition," says Martin.

First of all -- Martin says do what's right for you and then envision what you want. Here's a few tips:

• Start working on a plan -- even before you go on mat leave.
• Accept that you're going to get outside noise and criticism about implementing your ideas -- so get clear within yourself.
• Examine your expectations -- and make sure they're realistic.
• Implement a plan at both home and work -- and then figure out what support networks you need in place.
• Most of all -- Martin suggests talking about your emotions with your partner, family, friends and employer.

Pamela says her employer was very understanding. Easing into work on a part-time basis initially was instrumental to making it all come together.

Pamela says, "I know that working is what makes me happy. And when I'm happier, I'm a better mom."

If you'd like more tips from Lisa Martin -- go to www.briefcasemoms.com.

Thursday June 8, 2006